Core Momma

Rebecca, born and raised in an attractive growing Texas suburb, had a good childhood- very different from many Alabaster moms. With adoptive parents who were present and supportive, a close relationship with her younger sister, ample friends and family, Rebecca had an active church and community to grow up inside. However, she remained aware that she did not look like her family, and this made her feel like an outsider. Though her parents were alcoholics and had quit drinking when she was a baby, the disease still affected her family. Unable to understand or process her feelings, Rebecca found herself 14 years old and a friend group that changed with her interests and beliefs. “I remember taking that first drink and the little voice in my head that said “I’m not good enough” was quiet. I loved how I felt” Rebecca recalls. She continued to drink socially and using drugs throughout her teenage years, but towards her 20’s it became more frequent. After an ankle injury she was prescribed pain medicine and quickly became addicted, sending her down a spiraling road. 

During this time, Rebecca met the father of her two older daughters and soon gave birth to two beautiful children. Unfortunately, the drug use was out of control, and she could not even function as a person, much less a parent. CPS got involved after her second daughter’s birth, and they were removed from her care. Fortunately, her children did not have to enter the foster care system and were blessed with paternal grandparents who could step in to love and raise them. Humiliated and unaware what to do next, she did what she knew-run from the problems and use drugs. Only this time it got worse. She found herself homeless, no income, and frequently in jail to support her habit. Abusive behavior towards family and anyone who loved her left her separated and estranged for nearly 10 years. She didn’t want them to see how bad it was, and she blamed them for all her problems.  

It stayed that way until one day she got fed up with what she was doing and moved back in with her mother. She’d been going to a methadone clinic in South Dallas for 7 years, and quit the methadone. She was on the road to a better life, so she thought. Rebecca recounts, “I met a guy, moved in with him and got pregnant. This was my chance to get it right! I was going to do this differently, but I was still using drugs.” One night , with her new 8 month old baby, Rebecca was pulled over and arrested for driving while intoxicated. “My daughter went to her grandma’s, and I went to jail. I was disgusted that I was back in the same mess. I was fed up with dealing with the consequences of my addiction.” Rebecca remembers. She knew she did not belong in this kind of life. She did not belong in jail. How did this girl from Allen, TX end up like this?! CPS became involved once again, and the state of Texas assigned her a lawyer which began a course that would change her future. She confided to her lawyer how she needed help. So, Rebecca went to a prison-based drug rehab for 10 months and prayed every day. She told God that she would do the work if he removed the obsession to use from her life. She used her sentence as an opportunity to get the help needed. She sat down, shut her mouth, and started asking herself tough questions. In order to recover, you have to know what you’re recovering from. Rebecca got out and was blessed to live with life-long family friends who have loved her from infancy. They just wanted her to stay clean, get a job, and be okay.